Traveling Internationally? Avoid These Gaffes

When Mark Zuckerberg failed to tip for a meal or two in Rome on his honeymoon, it set the media abuzz. Although tipping is not required or expected in Italy, Americans are known to tip. Furthermore, Zuckerberg is known to be worth quite a bit of money, although not as much as he was a few weeks ago. 

Did Zuckerberg goof by not tipping? That’s hard to say, according to Daniel Post Senning, the great-great grandson of Emily Post and co-author of “The 18th Edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette.”

“It’s literally a cliché: ‘When in Rome...’ That is the larger concept—when you’re a guest in someone’s home, you operate under their rules. Certain expectations are incumbent on a guest. Maybe Mark got himself in a little trouble, maybe he researched ahead and [tipping in Italy is] about the level of service, not as firm a part of the social contract as it is here in the States. It is a subtlety…[although] as a very prominent American he might want to err toward more familiar territory.”

Obviously not all Americans face such scrutiny when traveling abroad, but it’s still advisable to avoid playing into the stereotype of the Ugly American. Here are some of the major ways American travelers can avoid unintentionally offending the locals.

By Colleen KanePosted 31 May 2012

Look, not every language sounds as musical as French. But nothing grates like an American tourist compensating for a lack of the most basic grasp of the local language by repeating their requests even louder in English.

No one expects travelers to be fluent in the primary language of every country they visit, but as Post Senning points out, “We live in an information age. If you’re capable of making reservations, getting on a plane and getting to another country, you’re capable of learning the bare minimum of what’s acceptable behavior over there, such as the language that’s spoken.”

“Making a minimum effort to learn the ‘magic words’ can go a long way to show your effort:  ‘please,'  'thank you,’ ‘hello,’ ‘goodbye,’ bathroom,’ I’m sorry.’”

Daniel Post Senning recommends embarking on your trip with a basic awareness of the political situation in the destination. Other factors to know about, according to the Emily Post Institute, are the national religion and minor faiths, and the correct full name of the country.

Regardless of the country, there are likely to be laws and mores a traveler wouldn’t anticipate without research. One example Post Senning provides: If you’re going to Saudi Arabia, it helps to know  you may not have alcohol in your possession.

He also recommends learning about the major holidays. Just as it would be handy for a foreign visitor to know about Independence Day in America, not realizing that it’s Bastille Day in France, or a bank holiday in London, can pose problems.

Again, Post Senning says, “You don’t need to be an expert,” just do enough research to ensure more comfort and fewer misunderstandings all around.

Travel means unfamiliar food and possibly eating utensils (or lack thereof), and the combination of table manners and reactions to new foods can mean many new ways to offend fellow diners.

“Bring a curious spirit and a willingness to try new things,” says Post Senning. He refers to the example on the AMC show “Mad Men,” when at the dawn of the jet age Don Draper is presenting a campaign to Conrad Hilton about Hilton Hotels. To paraphrase the tagline the fictional ad man dreamed up, “You can go anywhere in the world, and it’s just like you’re at home.”

“How much things have changed in 30 or 40 years. The idea you can expect all of the creature comforts [abroad]—like ice cubes in drinks—is no longer the standard. You’re not going to be able to anticipate everything. [Travelers need] a willingness to watch people around [them] and adapt.”

When thinking about dressing for travel in a foreign land, Post Senning advises, “Americans come from a culture both increasingly casual and informal.” That’s not universal. Traditional gender roles are still enforced with clothing rules in other countries. Wearing skimpy clothing can be another no-no, because — to bring up Rome again, for example — you can’t wear shorts into a cathedral.

Post Senning recommends that business travelers look at the business traditions and expectations before a trip — for example, he says that in Mexico you might not talk business on the first trip.

He advises having some awareness of how time is viewed in the culture. In America, if you’re not early or on time, then you’re late — but that’s not necessarily true everywhere. There are also considerations of posturing — there can be significance in the order of who shows up when in relation to others at the meeting. There can be subtleties to exchanging business cards, and formal introductions will also vary from country to country.

In America if you were staying at a house, you might bring a house gift, or if someone invites you to a dinner at their home, you might bring a hostess gift. Post Senning notes that in some other countries, a parting gift is traditional for business travelers, typically a gift brought from your home. There can also be traditions for how to say the final goodbye. As with the previous categories, all of these are good to know before you go.